I Was Most Courageous

I was most courageous
when I joined a group and I didn’t know anyone

Courage is
walking for an hour with a kneecap
that had split in half
not that I had much choice
going to your uncle’s wedding
when you know he is dying of cancer

I was most courageous
when I took the risk
to read my writing out loud
without stuttering
when I sang for someone
other than my bedroom walls

My most courageous moment
was when I led the group
to search for our adversary
at first step
I instantly became a proud warrior
in his fierce will to live
I found the reserve to go on

I was most courageous
when I came out to my parents
when I finally disclosed my experiences
about sexual abuse
when I allowed myself to smile again

My act of bravery
when I was there to hold her hand
learning not to judge others
sending a difficult letter
opening up to people
telling a boy/ a girl I like him/her

I was courageous
when I truly discovered
how ill my mother is
she sent me to bring her medication from the dresser
I was still able to breathe
even after I counted the bottles
and when I watched her die…